Should’ve Listened When They Told Me

Often I sit & wonder if I’m actually happy 
Or if I’m just distracted 
By the image in my head I’ve painted of us 

In actuality 
No one knows the darkness that envelops me 
Every. single. time. you say “I’m sorry”
& the sliver of warm light that shines through 
Every. single. time. I choose to believe you 

I should’ve listened when they told me
Not to try to repaint you 
When you showed me your true colors the first time